Anger by Heiða
He squinted his eyes as he watched her put the steak in the oven. His fist clenched around his “best dad in the world” mug as he thought about this betrayal.
He had been married to this woman for 28 years. He had been with her for 30! Part of the reason they were together had now been revealed as utter betrayal.
They had met on a drunken night at his local. She was not from around there, she was from a small village a few miles away. She and her friends decided to go somewhere new to party, meet new people.
He could not help but notice her. She was bubbly, loud and beautiful. She was everything he was not. He liked keeping himself to himself and when he did not, he preferred to only mingle with his closest friends and family. He did not care for new people. He liked familiarity and order in his people and way of living. Then she came and disrupted it all.
He knew he was set in his ways and he did not see anything wrong with that. He liked knowing what was coming. In the summer he would play golf on Thursdays, in winter he would spend one Sunday a month deer hunting with his dad and uncle. On Fridays all year around he would go to his local for a drink with the lads he grew up with. It was a simple way of living but fairly satisfying.
He had dealt with some depression. It seemed to be seasonal and as he had only been 20 when they met he did not know that there was a pattern and therefore he never saw it coming, he would not be prepared and he would be knocked right off his feet every time. Each time would hit harder than the last one.
When he met her he was feeling okay. It was the middle of the summer. He had no intentions of speaking to her though. He did not know her and neither did his friends. It was that simple.
She, however, set her eyes on him and smiled. She flirted with her eyes and would smile towards him every once in a while. He did not realise until she went to the restroom that her flirting was working as he found himself wondering where she had disappeared to.
When she came back she went to the bar, necked a shot of tequila and walked over to him. He felt very uncomfortable. He felt like a trapped pray. She was coming. She had caught him looking back throughout the night and she was obviously coming over to talk to him. This was not something he did.
- “You from around here?” She asked and put on a smile that was so big he could have counted all her teeth.
- “I am not. It’s a pretty neat pub! Where do you after this if you want to continue partying?”
- “I don’t know.. you might want to ask someone else..that’s not really my scene.. I usually just go home. Sometimes we pop over to Charlies for a drink but most of the times…”
- “Charlie! Who is he? Is he here?” All of a sudden she was sitting in his lap. He was a little confused. There was an empty chair by the table. He was definitely not used to this kind of directness. He also usually shook women off quite quickly by being himself but this one would not take a hint.
It was not that he did not like women nor that he could not attract them. That was far from reality as he had wide shoulders, dark eyes and thick hair to match. His sense of style was something he luckily got from his mum as he would not have stood a chance if he would have inherited his dads fashion sense.
Now this astonishing creature was sitting in his lap, talking away and giggling, while she pushed a lock of hair from his forehead back to where it belonged.
From that night on she sat on his lap. So to speak. They became an item. The fact she was bubbly and loud made up for the fact he was not. Sometimes it was almost as if she had conversations for both of them, even when they were on their own. He would only have to contribute if he thought she was in the wrong.
Christmas came and went. In January she started discussing the possibility of her moving in. What she did not know was that he was starting to feel down. His feelings turned sour as he called it when he spoke to his mum. His mum was the only person he would discuss his “episodes” with. He felt so bad it physically hurt. He also felt guilty for feeling like that as he had absolutely nothing to complain about. He had a gorgeous girlfriend, with a lovely personality. He had a job he enjoyed. His bills were always paid on time. He had his routine.
Still he felt helpless and hopeless. It did not seem fair as there were many people that were actually struggling with stuff.
However, that did not change his feelings.
He felt more and more depressed. She kept asking about moving in. He felt like he had nothing to offer. Being the way he was, a person like her should not get stuck with a liability like him. He broke it off.
Three days later he woke up in a hospital bed. He had apparently tried to take his own life. Drunk a bottle of vodka and chucked down some pills. His mum found him lying in a puddle of sick. He felt like shit. Why would he do that to his mum?!
She came to give him his key back when he returned from hospital. They ended up in bed together. They decided to give it another go.
A month later she told him she was pregnant and after that things escalated quickly. She moved in. Their son was born a few months later and they got married.
Now 28 years later they had 3 children and were expecting their first grandchild.
He had been thrilled about the news!
But the night they heard about the joyous news things took a turn to the worse. His daughter in law and wife had been talking in the kitchen. His wife had a little too much to drink. She was still as loud as she used to be, especially when she had finished a few glasses of rosé. They thought he was asleep on the sofa. But he heard them. He heard everything.
His daughter in law had asked her if it was true, what the women in the village were saying. Did she land him all these years ago by being sly?
His wife admitted that she had always wanted children but he did not want any at the time. He had told her that in his state he had nothing to offer her, let alone a child. She was sure he would make a fantastic dad, he just had to go for it. It might even get him to settle down properly and it could brighten his spirit. He would have someone to live for. Therefore, she stopped taking the pill around Christmas. She did not tell him, she even pretended to take a pill every day.
Once she found out she was pregnant she started talking about moving in. To her surprise he pushed her away and finally broke it off.
When she found out he had tried to off himself she was beside herself. She could not raise this child without a father. Therefore, she lured him into bed and later told him she had accidentally gotten pregnant. He did the decent thing and stepped up. Like she knew he would. He became a fantastic dad! He was a terrific dad and she had not regretted this for a second.
As he listened he felt a burning feeling inside. She had planned it. She planned his future and he had no say in it at all. She got to pick and choose, and he had to live with it.
She was still busy making the sides to go with the steak as he let go of his cup and stood up. His eyes had darkened, his eyebrows lowered and his nostrils flared.
She did not see him come from behind, she never knew what she had coming. He had grabbed the meat knife of the counter and he swung it as hard as he could.
In return for this betrayal, he got to write her final chapter.